I'm back, and sorry to say that once again Russia has dragged its orphans into the political swamp. The new adoption ban is Russia's retaliation for an American law that punished the persecutors of whistle-blower Sergei…

I'm re-reading Changing for Good, an excellent model of the psychology of change. It notes that personal change often looks like a spiral, with a move forward/upward followed by a regression.

That might be a fancy of saying "two steps forward, one step back."  It also begs the question, does behavior follow changing thought, or does changing thought follow behavior? 

A therapist will tell you both are valid ways to change -- feelings might follow behavior, for example,…

At first glance, a competitive family seems exciting: everyone working hard to top each other, or achieving greater and greater things. You'll sometimes see the competition for attention or status in conversation:

• Interrupting each other
• Having the last word (often unconsciously -- just with a sound of assent)
• Put-down humor
• Vocabulary tricks - using a "big word" or a slang term for status

On the more caustic side, you'll see it…

To paraphrase a Buddhist saying: 

"Trying to lose anger by yelling is like trying to put out a fire by throwing gasoline on it."